The Mental Jukebox Tuesday 12.25.7

Even if you don't celebrate Christmas or don't particularly enjoy Christmas music, "you" in this case meaning me, there are still some holiday tunes worth mentioning. And while "Jingle Bells" may not stick in my head, here are the Christmas songs you can find in rotation here on the Mental Jukebox.

Christmas in Hollis-- Run-DMC

Not only is this song used in one of my favorite holiday movies, "Die Hard," but it happens to bump just as hard as it did back in the day. A poignant reflection of holidays past, present and future, this early hip-hop holiday classic mentions collard greens without any hint of irony. Kudos for that.

Here It Is Christmas Time-- The Old 97's

Oh, come on. It's cute. And it has clever wordplay. And it makes you totally want to wrap the whole band up in some kind of soft goateed cowboy hat. "You" in this case meaning you.

Santa Looked A Lot Like Daddy-- Buck Owens

While exemplifying the Bakersfield sound at its peak, this song is truly frightening. Think of it as the birth of so many phobias. An Oedipal complex, perhaps an Electra complex, too... an unbreakable connexion between Christmas trees and foreplay... perhaps some confusion-- if Santa looks like Daddy, why the hell does he want me to sit on his lap, "me" in this case meaning me? And if I tell Mommy "what I know," will I get in trouble? Dammit! Now I'm a transvestite and I fucking hate Christmas, "I'm" in this case meaning someone I made up.

I Want A Mistress for Christmas-- AC/DC

And I hope you went shopping.

Favorite Holiday song of all time? Easy.
Here's Fairytale of New York by the Pogues and Kirsty MacColl. Enjoy it, you maggots, you cheap lousy faggots.



And may your gods, whomever they are, bless you, every one.